Burning Up
by shadow74236915
Summary: Riley knows not to fall in love with someone else, he's already experienced so much heartbreak. Dell never wanted to do this for a living, but he must if he wants to continue to live. Will these two ever make it as mercenaries for R.E.D? Contains M/M pairing. Rated T for language and blood.
1. Humble Beginnings

**Alright, folks... how many of you have heard of a game called Team Fortress 2? For those who haven't, i****t's a fast-action RPG, with nine different classes to choose from, and several game-modes to play. However, we're going to be focusing on two of those classes in this story.**

**I've been inspired by an amazing artist: moofrog. Check out her Tumblr page for her art and other things! (WARNING: some of her drawings are not safe for work, but not all of them...). The work she's done is giving me ideas for this, so you may make some connections here and there. She's also given me the drive to write this, as her work made me fall in love with this story's pairing.**

**The story will start out in an A.U., before going to the canon-verse. It'll make sense as we go along...**

**Well, that's as much as I can say right now. I do not own Team Fortress 2; that credit would go to Valve.**

* * *

Dell(1) was speed-walking through the halls of the school. He was going to be late to his next class if he slowed down even the _tiniest _bit right now, since he's about 165 yards away from the door, and with him going about 1.2 miles per hour with a little over a minute to get to the door, if he slowed down even 0.0001 MPH, he'd be late by a _second_. And if he was late, he'd ruin his 'Perfect Attendence' streak! That was something he would not put up with. But he couldn't speed up any, since he'd have to run to go faster, which _was not allowed_ in the hallways. And, in Dell's mind, he was nothing if he was a rule-breaker.

At Golden Gate High School(2), Dell wasn't very popular. On the contrary, many of the 'jocks' of the school picked on him for being a 'fat nerd', as they put it. ...even if it was kind of true. Dell, born in the 80's, grew up in a small town outside of Austin, Texas. A small town in the Midwest was technologically inept... scratch that, they barely knew what a phone was, let alone how to _use _it. So, when he and his family moved to San Francisco when he was about 10, they all had quite the culture shock. But Dell wasn't looking at the world in confusion or fear, but in _awe_.

Technology was amazing! He could talk to someone on the opposite side of the country in mere seconds, he could listen to music using a thin, black, disk, and he could see moving pictures of actors and actresses on a small-looking box, no projector needed! Dell's natural curiosity to know anything and everything started him on taking apart the television simply to know how it worked (even though his parents yelled at him for it later). After taking these new devices apart to see what they used, he started trying to put them back together, just to see if he could.

After several experiments, mostly failures, Dell started to get the hang of what was supposed to go where. Eventually, he found out that Public Libraries had books on the subject, and came home that day with a stack of books almost as tall as the having images and other helpful tips to work with, Dell began putting all the gizmos back together until they were just like new. His mother had actually started sobbing when he showed her the repaired television, pride and wonder in her eyes.

But fixing things soon got boring. It was the same old, same old, and he wanted to do something _new _with technology. He just didn't know what...

His answer came almost a month later, as his mother started complaining about how the entire house would heat up every time she turned on the oven to bake. So, Dell decided he would make her a smaller oven. It took a solid month of studying the big oven along with each of his books, before actually tinkering at his desk. Two months later saw him presenting the 'Mini-Oven' to his mother and father, a smaller, counter-top oven that was insulated to keep all the heat inside while it was running. He almost wished he took a photograph of his parent's faces.

That was when he began to make new things on his own. He started making new appliances that made life a little easier around the house, be it lights that turn off automatically to save energy, or improving his father's work tools so that they got the job done quicker.

Of course, he would spend a lot of his day sitting at the desk, not really doing anything. Combine that with the fact that he ate the same amount as he normally did, and... he put on some extra weight. Not _really _fat, but just enough for the jocks to make fun of his size. And it was not much of a secret that Dell built lots of new gadgets in his free time, so the jocks added 'nerd' and 'geek' to the list.

With no real skill in arts, and having lost his normally athletic body, Dell did his best to be the best he can academically. He soon started to follow rules to a 'T', trying to stay on the teachers' good sides. Now, he was nothing more than a fat, nerdy, teacher's pet to everyone else, and he had no desire to change that view of him.

...

Anyways, running wasn't allowed in the halls, which was a 'dammed either way' situation for Dell. Break one rule, or be late to class. So, he would have to remain walking at this speed, and he'd hopefully make it there befo-*SLAM*!

Two bodies crashed into each other, flying in opposite directions. The books in Dell's arms went flying, sending the sheets of paper wedged in them all over the place. Dell slowly picked himself off the ground, readjusting his glasses, before frantically gathering up all the lost homework. He squatted in the middle of the mess, gathering everything as quickly as he could. Just as he reached for the last piece of paper, another hand grabbed it at the same time. He froze in shock, seeing how injured it looked.

The hand was littered with a series of different burn marks, some fresher than others and a few that looked as though they were new. The most disturbing feature was the diamond mark on the back of the hand, almost resembling the brand marks he'd see on cattle. Dell looked up, wanting to see who this hand belonged to, but was met with a mop of ginger hair. The other boy (since it didn't look much like a girl's head and hand) was keeping his head bowed as to not show Dell his face. Dell quickly snatched the paper away and stuffed it in his bag.

"U-ummm..." he stammered, adjusting his glasses nervously. "...are you okay? Do you need to go to the nurse for those burns?"

_'Nice... _real _swell conversation starter there, Dell'_

The other boy tensed slightly, before shaking his head 'no'. Dell swallowed, not knowing what to say.

"You... you should go..." It was barely a whisper, Dell struggling to hear the other boy. The ginger quickly spun, careful not to show his face in the process, and quickly walked away.

Dell remained frozen for a few seconds, before shaking his head and rushing off to class. He was just about to open the door and step into the class, not late, but-

***BRRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGG!***

Dell sighed. He was late, and there was nothing he could do about it. He opened the door and walked inside, feeling his face heat up slightly at all the stares.

"Well well well... I never thought that _you _would be the last person to show up, Dell," his teacher, Ms. Holden, said surprised. Dell cleared his throat.

"U-ummm, well I guess there's a f-first for everythin'..." Ms. Holden nodded, then waved him to his desk.

"Go on." At his shocked look, she elaborated. "It's not fair to call you late for coming a second after the bell. Plus, you've been on time every other day this semester, so I think I can make an exception. However..." she added, noting his relieved face. "...let's not make this a habit, understand?" He nodded frantically, and she smiled slightly. He hurried over to his seat, head bowed, and sat down before taking out his notebook and pencil.

"Alright class, today we'll be discussing the events that sparked World War II, and we'll be making some connections between that and the Great War(3) so you should get out your notes from about a month ago. Now, since Germany had lost the Great War, the country had..."

* * *

"Conagher, Dell." He walked up to the stage, beaming smile on his face. He got his diploma, shook hands with the principal, and went back to his seat. There was only his parents clapping, but that was good enough for him, knowing someone cared enough to cheer. As he was walking back to his seat, the next name had been called.

"O'Bearn, Riley.(4+5)" There was no movement for a moment, until a bowed head with red hair stood up from next to Dell's. He silently walked up to the stage, no one able to see a glimpse of his face. As Dell and Riley passed each other, Dell couldn't help but take a longer look than necessary. This person seemed familiar to Dell, but he just couldn't place it. Putting the thought aside for later, he continued to his seat and waited for the rest of the ceremony to finish. Once the final name was called (a Mick Mundy, whoever that was), the principal congratulated the student's on graduating high school, and then asked for them to turn the tassels to the other side of the hat.

Blah blah blah, yadda yadda yadda (there was another speech here), time to throw the caps in the air.

The only hat that remained on a head was the boy seated next to Dell.

* * *

_(Fall of 2010...)_

Dell headed back to his small apartment he lived in during college. He wasn't _still _in college, finishing his last P.h.D. a few months ago, but he still hadn't found a good job for him yet. Sure, he had a bunch of offers from building companies, but they only wanted him to build what they wanted him to. He'd never get the chance to build the things _he _wanted to, and to show his inventions to the world. He would never get that kind of freedom working for some big-shot, multimillion dollar companies, so he still hasn't found a job he could be happy doing.

He sighed and stared at the sky as he walked, wondering when his luck would change.

"Mr. Conagher?" His head snapped back down to see a young woman, maybe a little younger than him, standing on the street corner in front of him where she hadn't been before.

"Um, yes? How can I help you, ma'am?" She seemed to be pleased at the formality, but remained stoic-faced.

"My name is Pauling, and I represent my boss, who wants to hire you." Dell blinked.

"Funny, I was wondering when the next set of 'build what we want you to build' jobs would come rolling in," he replied sarcastically. "I'm sorry Ms. Pauling, but I 'preciate not being told what I'm s'posed to build." Pauling nodded.

"My boss understands that. She doesn't want to hire you to build whatever she wants for her; rather, your teammates and others who would need it." Dell frowned, completely lost now.

"I'm sorry, who do you work for?"

"My boss." He stared at her, trying to see if she was making a joke, but found no hidden amusement.

"I mean, what company do you work for?" Her mouth widened in realization.

"Oh, excuse me. I work for R.E.D: 'Reliable Excavation Demolition'. We specialize in excavation operations, and demolition." Dell nodded.

"And what does your boss want with lil' old me?" Pauling grinned inwardly.

_'He's interested.' _She handed over a file of paperwork, which he grabbed hesitantly.

"This will explain most of your questions. I'll be here tomorrow once your done, so you can tell me whether or not you are willing to work for us. Good day." She turned on her heel swiftly and walked away. Dell watched her go for a few seconds, before taking a look at the file she handed him. As he looked back up he started, seeing (or, _not _seeing) that Ms. Pauling had seemingly vanished. He shook his head in bewilderment, and continued into his apartment.

**(Elsewhere, but not far away...)**

Pauling pulled out her phone, pressed a single button, and held the phone up to her ear, waiting for the other person to pick up.

*Any news on the candidates?*

"Yes ma'am. So far, Dell Conagher seems to be interested in working, and he may very well do so."

*...I seem to remember Mr. Conagher was 14th on the list. Why did you approach him first?* the voice asked,sounding amused. Pauling winced.

"W-well ma'am, he was high on the list for many different reasons, but was low for some others. In my opinion, if you'll pardon me, giving him a few months in 'The Farm' will give him the confidence and physical capabilities that are required for this mission. He has _11 P.h.D's_, ma'am; that makes him one of the most intelligent candidates on the list." The other voice was silent for a moment.

*You have convinced me to give Mr. Conagher the opportunity. However, if he does not show any improvement, or prevents R.E.D from moving along schedule like it should, then he _will _be dropped. I hope you understand what that will _mean _for Mr. Conagher...*

"Y-yes ma'am."

*Good. I would inform Mr. O'Bearn of the consequences of his actions.* The line clicked, leaving Pauling listening to dead air until she calmed down enough.

"W-...what did she say?" a small voice asked. Pauling smiled at the man hesitantly.

"Well, she knows that you wanted me to do this..." He started to tremble in fear at her words, looking around nervously. "..but she'll let it slide this once." He sighed in relief, but saw the worry on her face.

"...but?" he prompted. Pauling swallowed.

"His IQ is off the charts, which is why she even considered allowing this to happen, but he's not expecting what we're sending him to do. If he doesn't shape up into a man willing to kill another... then she will kill him herself."

Her companion gasped in shock, teats springing into his eyes. Pauling hesitatingly put a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.

"Look, let's just head back to the base for now. If he says yes, I promise you I'll train him myself if I have to." He smiled at her, happy she would do this for him, making Pauling smile in return. Out of all the mercenaries she had interviewed and hired for her boss, Riley turned out to be her favorite; he was soft-spoken, polite, and acted like a child at heart. She initially doubted he would be able to handle life as a R.E.D mercenary, but then she read the psychological reports on him, and those thoughts went flying out the window.

Keeping a hand on his shoulder, she led him to the car nearby and they drove off.

* * *

Dell stormed out of his house the next morning, heading back to the place he met that Ms. Pauling yesterday. He stood at the corner, looking around in circles trying to find her.

"Pauling!" he called out.

"Yes?" He jumped and whirled around in surprise to see Ms. Pauling standing right behind him. After getting over his initial shock, he glared at her.

"You want _me_ to be a _mercenary_ for R.E.D? Are you people out of your god-dang minds?!" he ranted at her.

"Mr. Conagher, I already said that we specialize in demolition and excavation; I never said it was all legal." Dell clutched his head in annoyance.

"And why does R.E.D need to demolish other _people_, for chirst's sake?!"

"Have you heard of B.L.U, by any chance?" Dell paused in consideration.

"It was mentioned in the files I read..." Pauling nodded.

"Well, B.L.U, which stands for 'Builder's League United', is R.E.D's rival company. When diplomacy never is achieved between the two, the mercenaries are called in to... 'persuade' the other." Dell blanched at the insinuation in her tone.

"B-but... I never wanted to build weapons of war! I wanted to make things that would make people's lives easier..."

"This will make other lives easier; your fellow mercenaries'." Dell shook his head.

"I-I'm sorry Ms. Pauling, but I don't know if I can agree to this..." Pauling nodded, her lips a thin line.

"Did you read the full file?" Dell, confused, nodded. "Then I'm afraid you have no choice; those files contained sensitive information that no ordinary civilian should ever be allowed to know." He froze in shock and fear. "I see you understand just how serious we are. Now, will you come quietly, or will I have to shoot you?"

"B-but..." She sighed and pulled out a small pistol hidden on her person. She fiddled with it, glancing up at Dell every once in a while to see if he made a decision. Dell couldn't form the words fast enough to say anything, so Pauling simply pointed the gun at him and fired. Dell screamed, and clutched his chest expecting pain, but felt... numbness? Was the pain so much that his body shut down the nerves in that area? He removed his hands from the wound to see...

...a dart. She shot him with a tranquilizer dart.

And that was his last coherent thought before he slumped to the ground, fading into darkness.

* * *

**Well folks, I've got this first chapter kicked out! ;)**

**I want to say that I'm still mostly unfamiliar with the actual story for TF2, so please bear with me and totally tell me if there's anything I'm messing up. Fact checks will be greatly appreciated.**

**Also, please bear with the writing style; again, I'm mostly unfamiliar with TF2, unlike how I am with Fairy Tail. There's going to be hesitation from me, but I'm still trying!**

**FOR TEXAS TOAST!**

**A.N.'s:**

**(1): This name is practically canon**

**(2): I'm sorry if anyone actually _does _go/has gone/will go to this school! I just came up with a random name for a school, and it seems plausible...**

**(3): This may sound weird, but does anyone actually call this WWI? I was initially taught that, but then learned it was just 'The Great War' some years later...**

**(4): I came up with this name _ON MY OWN_. This is also based off the fact that maskless!Pyro as drawn by moofrog looks like he is of Irish decent, but was born and raised in America. 'Riley' is a somewhat English name, while 'O'Bearn' sounds like an Irish last name. Notice the pun, anyone? (say it with a scottish-or-something accent)**

**(5): I don't _care _if graduation ceremonies have to be completely alphabetical. My sister's graduation was kids sitting down in random order, getting called up in an also-random order.**

**Alright, I hope I did a good job in representing the characters. Next chapter is a series of glimpses at 'The Farm', and Dell's arrival to the team.**

**Until then!**

**~_Kage Musha_**


	2. First Day On the Job

**Cool beans, guys! Second chapter is ready for reading!**

**So, first off, I'm changing the time to around 2010. I don't care how many of you are gonna get mad at me that TF2 is set in the 70's, and I'm ruining canon with me doing this; this is how I want it to run. I'll change the first chapter to match up... eventually...**

**Second, I hope you guys realize that Riley is an OC Pyro. He'll be the _only _RED Pyro in this story (and maybe some others), and I'm giving him some quirks/traits that I want him to have.**

**Riley: Like what?**

**KM: *falls out of his chair* RILEY?! Jegus, you scared the _hell _out of me!**

**R: (depressed)Oh... I-I'm sorry...**

**KM: Don- Don't do the 'I'm a victim' routine...**

* * *

**HEY! Who wants to read some _bullshit_~?**

**"Guest:  
**

**1. Average human walking speed is 3 miles per hour. 1 mph is ridiculously slow. **  
**2. Texas is not in the midwest**  
**3. A small town outside of Austin (ie round rock) in the 1970s would grasp technology just as well as any other small town anywhere else in the US, maybe even a little better, seeing as Austin is quickly rising to the top of the charts."**

**Am I getting this right, readers? Do I have to actually _fact-check this shit_?!**

**I don't even know _why _this was necessary, 'Guest'... it's stupid, pointless, and I'm sure as hell not going to change it.**

**Thank you for wasting everyone's time today. ;)**

**(Texas is also in the middle of the goddamm country; I'm _pretty _sure that means it's Midwest... or East... whatever makes you fucking happy, stranger...)**

* * *

**I do not own Team Fortress 2. Special thanks to moofrog for inspiring me.**

* * *

Dell sighed as he sat on the train, staring at the desert landscaping passing by the window. It had been two months since his sudden kidnapping at the hands of Ms. Pauling, and every day was spent in _that _place. He shuddered involuntarily, thinking of all the things he had to do to survive there. The reasoning was, "If you can survive here, doing worst-case scenario simulations, you can survive _anything_."

The logic in it made sense, in a twisted and psychotic way.

He shuddered again, not from 'The Farm', but from the idea of his new job. He spends his days roaming from base to base, competing against B.L.U for different objectives, and killing people; let's not forget about killing others on a daily basis.

Honestly, what was there to be nervous about?

"We'll be at Teuford Station in about half an hour, Mr. Conagher. I suggest you prepare your belongings." Ms. Pauling's voice snapped him out of his daze, and he checked his luggage to make sure everything was set.

"Mr. Conagher?"

He ignored her, not wanting to speak to her while his nerves continued to get the best of him.

"Mr. Conagher?"

He continued his attempt to ward off conversation.

"_Dell_."

That got his attention. In the few months he'd known the woman, she had never once referred to him by his first name. Usually the 'Mr. Conagher', but sometimes it was just his last name; _never_ would she say his name. He looked up at her, and was shocked to see the tiniest hint of emotion in them; again, a first.

"Are you alright?" she asked with the bare amount of concern in her tone. He chuckled nervously.

"Well, ma'am, I'm spendin' the rest of my life killing people for a livin'. I reckon it'd take a while for anyone to jus' accept it..." Pauling smiled grimly.

"Dell... before I go, I would like to say that I am rooting for you out there." He huffed softly, and she cuffed him on the head softly. For _her_, at least. "I'm serious! Out of all the people I've had to train at 'The Farm', you have the highest chance of succeeding out there. Some of them are smart, and some aren't; some are calm, and some are... impulsive." She made a face with the 'impulsive'(1), but continued. "The thing is, you have the intelligence _and _the composure. You've been able to solve almost every single scenario we threw at you with nothing but your toolbelt, except for the ones where you weren't allowed (Dell shuddered at the thought). Even without it, you solved the crisis with a calm head; you will be great out there... I know it." Dell sat there shocked for a moment, not used to an inspiring speech from the woman, but grew a smile eventually.

"Well, shucks. If someone like you says somethin' like that, I guess I'd better believe it!'' he chuckled softly, gaining an honest smile from Ms. Pauling. The train started to slow down, signifying they were arriving momentarily. Once the train had pulled into the station, Dell stood up while Ms. Pauling remained. He was about to walk away, when he turned to face her and stuck his hand out. She quickly stood to accept his handshake.

"It's been a pleasure, Ms. Pauling." he said in farewell. She remained solemn for a moment, before cracking an imperceptible grin.

"I hope you realize that this will not be the last time we meet." Dell blushed in embarrassment for a moment.

"Erm... w-well, it'll be the last time we meet as teacher and student." he fumbled up a response. She pondered it for a moment, but accepted it. With that, Dell grabbed what few bags he had and exited the train.

* * *

The first thing Dell noticed was the helmet.

It looked like it had been worn during WWII, especially with all the bullet holes and heavy-duty nails stuck in it.

Then he saw the rest. Or, at least, the person _wearing _the helmet.

Who was also screaming in his ear.

"ATTENTION, MAGGOT!" Dell froze for all of a millisecond before his training with Ms. Pauling kicked in, and he stood perfectly still at full attention. The soldier (because that's what the man looked like) inspected the new R.E.D recruit with a pleased eye.

"Hmmm... it seems Ms. Pauling got to you. What's your record?" Dell remained silent for a moment as he swallowed the catch in his throat.

"Ah... almost a full day, sir..." he said relatively softly.

"I CAN'T _HEAR _YOU, MAGGOT!"

"2350 hours(2), SIR!" Dell responded. The soldier looked impressed.

"Very nice... but it seems no one has yet to beat my record of a full week..." the man said, practically talking to himself. Dell's eyes widened in fear, and his mouth went dry.

Was this actually worse than 'The Farm' somehow?! Oh, god... he should've just taken the chance to kill himself on the train...

The soldier fixed him with a sharp glare.

"Now you listen here, maggot! From now on, you are a member of the R.E.D mercenaries, which means you are my teammate! If I see, at ANY moment, that you are not pulling your own weight, I will have you shipped out to hunt for landmines... with a hammer(3)! AM I CLEAR?!"

"SIR YES SIR!"

"Right now, you are on the bottom of the food chain, which means you will answer to everyone, and order no one! AM I CLEAR?!"

"SIR YES SIR!"

"And one more thing, if I EVER see-"

"OI, WANKER!" The soldier froze, mid-tyrannical-rant, and turned to the other end of the station.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT, MAGGOT, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY?!" The other man sighed, pulled out a pistol, and fired right at the drill sergeant. A dart sprouted on his throat, and the soldier immediately started wobbling as he tried to stay upright.

"Tr-traitor..." he managed to get out, before he fell to the ground and started snoring. Dell didn't even dare to move, still petrified at the prospect that _this _would be his new life. The second man walked up to his sleeping companion, and shoved him lightly with his boot.

"Sorry 'bout 'im, mate; Solly 'ere likes breaking in the 'new recruits'... Oi, what's up?" Dell still hadn't moved, too scared to, and the Australian-sounding man quickly put two and two together. "Ah... at ease, mate." Dell instantly relaxed, trying not to show the utter terror on his face, which caught the gunman's attention. "Heh, looks like Solly was roight 'bout you bein' tougher than most. Guy who recently joined 'fore you was sobbing the moment I let 'im out of Attention." Dell chuckled softly, before eyeing the sleeping man warily.

"Erm... I get bein' on th' bottom, since I jus' started, but will he _actually _send me ta..."

"No, he don't have the proper authority. Worst he can do is assign you extra chores 'round the base." The man perked up as if just remembering something. "Blimey! Nearly forgot!" He stuck his hand out, which Dell took happily. "Call me Sniper. That's my main job, keepin' an eye over the rest of you!" Dell nodded warmly.

"Figured as much with that little presentation righ' there." Sniper raised an eyebrow.

"Really? All I did was point the gun and pull a trigger..." Dell scoffed.

"Please, y' didn' even take time ta aim; y' shot him without even checkin' yourself, even though y'might'a ended up shootin' me 'nstead. On top of that, y' shot him right in tha external jugular vein(4), the best place ta quickly knock out someone with a sleeping dart. If _you_ aren't tha sniper, I'mma terrified ta meet tha man who_ is_." The sharp-shooter chuckled.

"Well, guess they really did put ya through 'The Farm'..." Dell shuddered at the mention, before attempting to steer the conversation onto a new topic.

"Well, my name's-" A hand instantly covered his mouth.

"Sorry mate: no real name allowed." Dell's eyes widened, and he removed Sniper's hand.

"Are you kiddin' me?!" Sniper shrugged.

"I don' make tha rules, jus' follow 'em. Rules say 'Class Name ONLY'." Dell sighed in annoyance.

"Well then, I reckon' I'm your new Engineer..." Sniper 'hmm'ed thoughtfully.

"Alroight Engie, let's get ya back to tha base now." Dell started.

"What did you call me?" Sniper shrugged.

"Engie. Real names may not be allowed, but that don't mean we can't give out nicknames. So, Engie." Dell nodded, before grinning softly.

"Alright then... _Snipes_." The Australian laughed out loud, clapping Dell on the back as they walked out of the station._  
_

"Now you're gettin' the hang of it!"

...unfortunately, they forgot about the soldier sleeping in the station.

* * *

Dell hopped out of the van that Sniper used to ferry him to the R.E.D Base. The place looked like a ghost town, to be honest, and no one walking around didn't help to dissuade his opinion.

"Erm... where're the others at?" Dell asked hesitantly. Sniper scoffed.

"Lazy wankers must still be sleeping..."

"Sleepin'? What time is it?" A quick check of the watch.

"About 11:25."

"That's lazy?!"

"Trust me, these wankers are usually up at the crack o' dawn thanks to Solly. This is _really _sleeping in late." Sniper marched into the base, Dell trailing behind with his luggage to carry. The Australian walked in and looked around, sighing when he didn't see a single soul up. Dell, meanwhile, was looking around the base, interested in exploring his new home for the next lifetime. The main entrance led to the more work-based area of the base, holding all the weapons and vehicles. A set of stairs in the back corner, however, led up into the living area for the team. There was a sitting room connected to a nice-sized kitchen, perfect for making meals for nine people, along with a dining room and rec room, to give the mercs something to do when they're bored. Branching off from the sitting room was a hallway leading to nine separate doors, each with a different symbol in red.

Sniper walked back into the sitting room, slightly annoyed at how no one had gotten up yet. He sighed, pulled out his pistol, and aimed it at the ceiling, ready to fire it.

"AH! Don't aim at the ceiling!" Sniper paused at Dell's outburst.

"What's wrong with that?" Dell slowly turned red, and coughed to hide his embarassment.

"Well, ya might end up shooting gas or water pipes in the ceilin', or electrical cords to power the base. If you're gonna use your gun as an alarm clock, shoot out the window 'nstead." Dell accented his words by sliding open the window in the sitting room. Sniper processed what the Engineer was saying, before shooting out the window three times in a row prompting Dell to close it right after. A few seconds later, a man in a brown suit and balaclava appeared out of nowhere next to Sniper, making the man jump in shock.

"Dammit, ya Spook!" Sniper yelled. The mask-wearing man chuckled.

"Zhat was _quite _the wake-up call..." Sniper scoffed.

"And? They should be glad I ain't Solly, or there'd be a bloodbath in 'ere!"

_'Bloodbath?! Has the Soldier _killed _his teammates before?! ...This day couldn't get any worse...__'_

***ATTENTION. MISSION STARTS IN ONE HOUR.***

...

_"I lied."_

"SHIT!" Sniper yelled. He ran down the hall, slamming on doors in an attempt to get everyone up. "Get up NOW you wankers!" Spy extended his hand in Dell's direction, not bothering to face the man.

"You must be our new teammate, oui?" Dell took his hand, shaking as he watched Sniper freak out.

"Yeah. I'm an Engineer; from what I've been taught, I'll have to watch out for your B.L.U counterpart, won't I?" Spy chuckled.

"Oui. He'll be pleased zhat an enemy Engineer has finally arrived."

A door opened down the hall, and a young, scrawny-looking man came out.

"Wazzat... Snipes?"

Another door opened, and a middle-age man in a white, doctor's coat peered out.

"Vhat is vith all zhe noise?!"

Two more opened, revealing a black man wearing a beanie and a man who defined 'large'.

"Eh? Waz'za goin' on?"

"Who wake Heavy from sleep time?!"

"MISSION STARTS IN _ONE HOUR, _WANKERS! GET MOVING!" There was no movement for a few seconds, as they all processed the information. They all quickly ran back into their rooms, getting prepped for today's battle. Sniper turned around, looking down to the end of the hallway, and swallowed nervously.

"Ah... is the Pyro up yet?" he asked the Spy. Spy made a face.

"He is awake... but he has been pacing around 'iz room all day..."

"Any idea why?"

"Non." Sniper tentatively walked over to the door at the end of the hall, the one covered in burn marks, and knocked, _ever _so gently.

The door was practically pulled off the wall by the room's inhabitant.

Sniper waved hesitantly. "Ehehe... hey, Pyro. Um, the mission starts in an hour-" The other person quickly pushed past Sniper, wearing full gear and lugging a flamethrower. "-and you're ready anyways. Good." Pyro continued down the hall until he reached Dell, stopping only a foot away. Dell coughed nervously.

"H-hi there." Pyro waved back, albeit shakily. "Um, my name's... not Engineer, but that's what you'll call me, I reckon..." Pyro nodded, before solemnly walking down the stairs out of the living quarters. Dell turned to the Spy.

"Is he usually like that?" Spy shrugged.

"He iz a very... strange individual... To 'iz namesake, he burns things. Quite often, actually. That alone makes me wonder if he iz... _all zhere_." Dell looked back at the retreating figure, somehow feeling a shred of pity. He started walking to the stairs.

"I've got my gear set already; I'll just see ya down there..." Spy nodded his understanding, and Dell made his way downstairs. Pyro was sitting on a stack of crates, dangling his feet almost carefree-like. Dell walked over and leaned against the crates next to him.

"Howdy." Pyro stared at Dell for a moment. "I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot; you just surprised me up there, is all..."

"MMMhhh, mrh's mrmay... M'm mhsed mm mt..." Dell froze.

_'The... the mask...'_

"Uh... your mask is-"

"Mm MHOW mhout mh mhsk, mhmay!" Pyro interrupted, irritated. Dell coughed awkwardly.

"Just, uh... just making sure..."

* * *

"Alroight, ya bloody wankers, we're going after the enemy intelligence today!" Multiple groans of frustration. "Ya think _Oi'm _enjoying this?! Boss isn't letting us do anything else, fifth time or not; we're just gonna haf'ta deal with it." Sniper's eyes widened in realization. "Oh yeah! Engie! Have ya gone over this before with Ms. Pauling?"

"A little. She explained what we're supposed to do; ya know, grab the intelligence n' guard ours. She just let it drop after that..." Sniper nodded.

"Well, your job's pretty simple, mate; you're gonna set up a defense 'round tha intel with your sentries, maybe some dispensers too. And any teleporters you can set up to make it easier for us to get back quick would be helpful as well." Dell started to nod, then stopped.

"Hold up; how do you guys know what I build? I haven't even discussed it with you yet." Sniper gave a grim chuckle.

"We've been dealing with that B.L.U Engineer for 'bout a month; we know _all _your little tricks. Also, did they give you the chip yet?" Dell rubbed the back of his neck, nodding as he did so.

"Again, they never really explained what it's for, just that it was necessary 'fore I came here..."

"I-It's like a tracker; it let's everyone on the team know where everybody else is. It'll also warm up a bit when you're headed out of bounds."

"Got it. Any other useful information before I get shot at?" The rest of the group gave light chuckles.

"Alroight, let's head out!"

As the team walked out of the base, Medic quickly ran up to Sniper.

"Sniper..."

"Wot, Medic?"

"...do you feel like zere's something we are forgetting?" Sniper frowned.

Now that he mentioned it...

* * *

*BA-BOOM* *PSCHEW* *VVVVVRRRRATTA-TATTA-TATTA-*(5)

*CLANG...CLANG*

Dell continued to build the sentry up, while trying to block out the noise that shook the earth above him, from his position in the Intelligence Room.

Honestly, it was a bit of a wonder he hadn't seen any BLU members yet, but he wasn't gonna start complaining now.

*BRRRZZZTTT!* Dell jumped, confused at the new sound. As he looked around, he saw that the sentry he had finished upgrading had some new attachment on the top, making it spark and go haywire. He ran over to get the infernal device off, but froze when he felt a blade between his shoulder blades.

He just _had _to jinx it, huh?

"Hrmmm... shoddy work for zhe first day, _non_?" Dell's breath caught in his throat, and he felt helpless and terrified as he watched his sentry explode. "I heard you came from 'Zhe Farm', and I was eager to see how well you would fare... I am sorely disappointed."

He couldn't move... couldn't breathe; he was in a stupor, terrified that he was going to die.

"EAT ROCKETS, SPY-MAGGOT!"

And suddenly, Dell's captor had exploded in a shower of blood and gore. Dell turned around, grateful to his savior, but that changed quickly when he saw the look on Soldier's face as the man marched down the hallway.

"Maggot..." he growled out. "...If you ever, and I mean _ever_, leave me at the Train Station again, I WILL SEND YOU TO THE NORTH POLE AND HAVE YOU DIVING FOR FISH, _IN YOUR UNDERWEAR_!"

"I'm sorry s-" Dell paused, as he noticed a blue dot appear on the Soldier's helmet.

"WHY HAVE YOU STOPPED SPEAKING, MAG-"

"_LOOK OUT_!" Dell ran forward, in an attempt to push the Soldier out of the line of fire. A gunshot rang out throughout the base, and the American collapsed to the ground, dead. Dell froze, his hand outstretched to where the Soldier was standing, alive and fine, moments before. He fell to his knees, and started to tremble.

"N-no... oh m-my god..."

"Mmmt's mmmng?" Dell turned to see Pyro walking into the room...

...and directly into the B.L.U. Sniper's sights.

"GET DOWN!" Dell quickly yanked the fire-man behind a wall, and just in time as well due to the bullet that barely missed the masked head.

"He just... h-he just k-killed Soldier..." Dell sat there, curled into a ball, shivering in shock. Pyro stared at him, almost like he was confused by Dell's reaction. He put a hand on Dell's shoulder, and shook him gently. As Dell looked up, tears forming in his eyes, he saw Pyro miming a watch, and then shaking his head.

The message was clear enough, _"No time to mourn right now."_

Dell half-laughed half-sobbed at Pyro's bluntness.

"Alright... who's left out there?" Pyro pointed at Dell and himself.

_"Just you and me..."_

"Shit... Alright, d'ya think you can hold 'em off? Or at least get their 'ttention?"

_"Yeah... but what are _you _gonna do?" _Dell pulled a face.

"I'm goin' fer a swim."

...

...

Later in life, Dell would describe what happened next as _the _most disgusting thing he had ever done.

Swimming in a sewer system was... not as easy as he had hoped.

On the contrary, he had to hold his breath just so he wouldn't pass out.

Eventually, he made it to a flight of stairs out of the water, and practically leapt into them.

_'Stairs... why the hell would stairs lead _into _the goddamm water?' _he thought to himself as he climbed. He heard shouting and shooting in the distance, meaning Pyro was doing his job well. _'Good, they've got all their attention on him,which means...' _He walked into the Intelligence area, not hearing anybody. _'...nobody's guarding their intelligence. Perfect.' _He walked down the hall, and was about to step inside when...

*BRRZZT*

He froze, his foot almost past the doorway into the room.

Of _course _their Engineer would still be here, defending the intelligence. Guess he didn't think of everything...

Suddenly, he heard footsteps coming his way from inside the Intelligence Room. He hid behind a corner, and watched as the shadow slowly came towards his hiding place. He prepared his wrench, waited for _just_ the right moment, and...

*KER-WHACK*

The enemy Engineer went down hard as Dell's wrench flew into his skull. Honestly, Dell wasn't quite ready to kill just yet, due to his kind nature, but he was willing to knock someone out if needs be. As he stared at the enemy for a moment, he noticed how, strangely, it was like looking into a mirror...

That was when the second, genius phase to his plan sprung into his mind.

...

...

It was awkward, honestly, trying to put on another man's shirt. It was also awkward after you removed said shirt from said man (who happened to be unconscious), while putting your own shirt onto the man. Just... awkward.

Luckily, his plan worked wonderfully, since he was able to successfully trick the BLU Sentry into thinking he was the BLU Engineer. He grabbed the Intelligence and, for good measure (and because he didn't want the BLU Engineer to accidentally get himself shot to death), disable the Sentry by removing two wires. He immediately ran out of the BLU base, holding the Intelligence, and sprinted for all he was worth. He made it to the bridge to see Pyro successfully holding off the approaching BLU's with a flare gun, shooting at any BLU who tried to show their face. Dell ran across the bridge, screaming, "RUN PYRO!", who understood immediately and hightailed it out of there.

"Tiny baby man! What are you-" the BLU Heavy started. The gears had finally clicked that maybe, just _maybe_, that wasn't their Engineer, but Dell was halfway across the bridge by then. "YOU ARE FAKE ENGIE!" the Heavy roared, and started spraying the bridge with bullets._  
_

They started out small, like bee stings, really. But when one sailed right through his knee after he made it to the end of the bridge, he screamed in pain and fell. He raised his head and saw Pyro standing there, like he wanted to help but was afraid to come out.

"Pyro!..." Dell wheezed. "Catch!" With the last bit of strength he had, he slid the briefcase across the ground, which slid all the way to Pyro's feet. The masked man quickly picked up the briefcase, and took off down a corridor. Dell smiled triumphantly, and let his head fall.

_'Great... now I'm dying my first day on the job... 'highest chance of succeeding' my ass...'_

***SUCCESS. RED HAS CAPTURED THE INTELLIGENCE.***

_'At least we won...'_

* * *

_'Why is it getting brighter? And... this... ARGH! AGONY!'_

Dell had been floating in darkness, accepting that _this _was going to be his eternity, and feeling... disappointed.

That was when the pain began, and it was like nothing else on earth. Every nerve was on _fire_, after being blown to bits and dipped in acid. That was the closest he could come to describe it, and it _still _was an understatement.

"...waking up!"

"Engin... are you...?"

"...baby man? Is okay?"

He heard voices, voices of... the rest of RED? Oh, wait... they were dead like him.

"ENGINEER!"

Dell sat straight up, gasping loudly as he took in a needed breath of air. He took in a few more gulps as he analyzed his surroundings.

"So... *huff huff*... can one a y'all tell me... *huff*... what in tarnation's goin' on?"

"Orders, dude. We were s'posed to stay off the battlefield if we died... at least 'til you did," Scout started. Dell blinked.

"So... we _are _dead?"

"Vhat?! No vone told you about zhe Respawn System?!" Medic broke in.

"The whaaa?" Medic rubbed his temples.

"Mein Gott... zhey never told you..."

"Yeah, ya said that already..."

"Zhe Respawn System is exactly vhat it sounds like; vhen you die, you are brought here vhere you are brought back to life, ready for battle again!" Dell gaped.

"You mean... this _entire time_, me freakin' out 'bout dying wasn't _needed_?!" He started to look around frantically. "Where's Soldier?!" The helmeted man stepped to the front of the small crowd.

"Right here, Private." He yelped loudly when Dell suddenly grabbed the collar of his shirt and brought the man face-to-face.

"Listen here, bucko: I don't 'preciate bein' traumatized when a man's head explodes right in front of me, after I _try to save him_. If it happens again, _I _will send _you _ta play Russian Roulette (Heavy coughed awkwardly) with a fully loaded gun; am _I _clear? _Sir_?" Soldier swallowed quietly.

"Ah... yes Private, we're clear."

The rest of the team could only stare in shock as Soldier, who was willing to use rockets like a springboard, be turned into this meek and quiet man within seconds.

* * *

_(Later in the Infirmary...)_

"Medic... what was all that out in the battle today?" Dell asked hesitantly from his bed. Medic 'hmm'ed in confusion, without turning his head.

"I'm not quite sure vhat you mean..." Dell scoffed.

"Don't tell me you haven't seen it! Everyone on the other team looks almost _exactly _like us!" Medic remained quiet and continued working on his Medigun, which had been damaged during the battle. Dell looked at the German expectantly, silently demanding an answer. Finally, the doctor sighed.

"Have you ever heard of zhe 'Doppleganger Theory?" Dell thought for a moment, before shaking his head. "I thought as much. Vell, the 'Doppleganger Theory' relates to zhe idea of overlapping looks. Billions of people in zhe vorld, vith millions of different appearances, meaning zhere are at least 1,000 people in the vorld who look identical to you.(6) Even less likely is seeing a person who has little to no difference to your own features. I am not sure vhy our 'dopplegangers' are hired as B.L.U mercenaries, but I haff made my own... 'branch theory', you could say, off the 'Doppleganger Theory' using our current employments as a, shall ve say, foundation.

My own theory(7), is that, in very few instances, zhere is a Doppleganger who has almost the _exact _same experiences as zhe other. I say _almost_, because no person can ever share the same experience with another. For example: your place of birth, zhe school you vent to, which company you vere hired by..." Dell raised an eyebrow in amusement. "...zhe list is endless! Zhat's vhy zhe B.L.U Engineer looks like you, but does not _act _like you... or so I believe." Dell chuckled softly.

"I've had first hand experience with that one. My cousin, on my mother's side, well... people sometimes said we were twins from different mothers.(8)"

"Oh?"

"Not kiddin'. Jeb and I, we were completely identical in almost every way. We both loved buildin' models with our grand-pop, we were in love with machines when we first discovered 'em, and we both passed at the top of our class. But, he went t'a different college than me, and I never heard from 'im after I graduated, since I was... suddenly employed."

"I see... well, if you believe you can handle it, you can be discharged from the Infirmary."

"Got it. Thanks Medic."

* * *

**God, this took FOREVER to get out... I hate writing battle scenes...**

**A.N. Note Time!:**

**(1): Pauling doesn't like Scout at all... yet? Maybe I'll start a poll... *hint-hint***

**(2): I _think _this is how it's supposed to be said...?**

**(3): Someone should get the reference. lol**

**(4): That's a thing. I checked. It seems to be a good spot, since it delivers the blood to the head, including the brain, so it'd be a quick way to deliver the drug to the brain quickly.**

**(5): ...I feel like I'm not doing this right... somehow...**

**(6): Thank's to Urban Dictionary for a good definition on this subject.**

**(7): I'm not sure if this actually exists, but I think it's very possible. It just seems _very _rare. (I may also be slightly bullshitting due to the fact that I need an explanation to this shit. No one really seems to talk about it much, except for the fics where its the entire plot)**

**(8): *HINT* This will become important in the future. Mark it in your notes or something.**

**One more thing folks; I don't give a SHIT about whether or not this is factually accurate. Don't like it? Stop reading.**

**I don't do this so that you are pleased with what I write (well... sorta); I do this because _I _enjoy writing. I'm not going to make it a chore instead of a hobby by combing database after database _just _so my work is 100% correct.**

**On TOP of that, this is a _completely _different universe! Have _you _recently discovered a mine of Australium? Didn't fucking think so. So why can't my universe be _slightly _different compared to real life? Am I writing about the real world? FUCK NO._  
_**

**...**

**...shit. I was ranting again, wasn't I?**

**Riley: Yeah... you kinda were.**

**KM: I know, I know... it's just... just... RAAAAHHHH! The anon hate is so FUCKING ANNOYING!**

**Riley: Okay, calm down, Ash. *starts backing away slowly***

**KM: I don't need to make _FUCKING_ sure that DELL'S WALKING SPEED IS _BIOLOGICALLY ACCURATE_!**

**Riley: Why are you underlining-**

**KM: TO EMPHASIZE MY POINT _EVEN_ _MORE_!**

**Riley: ...Okay. So, I'm just gonna leave the room now... *opens door**

**KM: *throws random lamp across room, where it hits the wall next to Riley and _smashes into_ _tiny little pieces_* SEE THAT 'GUEST'? THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO TO _YOUR_ _HEAD_!**

**Riley: *starts running for dear life***

**KM: I WILL DESTROY YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU LOVE 'GUEST'! YOU WILL-**

* * *

**~_Kage Musha_**

* * *

**I need to work out my anger issues... :(**

**Just... no more Anon hate, okay?**

**I'm sorry if anyone got scared. I try to be a nice person overall! But if you irritate me in some way... god, I'm plotting your fucking demise using the greatest torture devices known to man.**


End file.
